The Very Rev. George L. Werner, president of the House of Deputies, is a self-acknowledged “schmoozer” willing to go just about anywhere he is invited. Shortly after General Convention ended, it occurred to Dean Werner that he ought to use his office to send out some communication, especially to those deputies, alternates and committee members with whom he had been communicating prior to convention.

“When we are in the midst of a pastoral situation, my preference is to err on the side of the angels,” he said. “My fear now is that anything I say will send a message to one or more groups that they don’t matter.”

That concern raises an even more troubling issue — the relative silence that has settled over the church.

During more than 40 years as a priest, Dean Werner said he has learned a number of valuable lessons from counseling couples who were experiencing marital conflict. The first lesson is that real conversation can’t begin until both parties are sincerely willing to hear what the other is saying. Another lesson is that inviting “outsiders” to choose up sides in what he sees as an internal “family” dispute makes effective conversation almost impossible.

“Families need to work on things themselves,” he said. “When you bring in outsiders, that is usually not helpful.”

Dean Werner is willing to concede that there is a remote possibility that further mature conversation would lead both sides to conclude that there is no possibility that they can remain in community with their respective theological consciences intact. In that unlikely event, Dean Werner said he hopes that any separation discussions proceed with as much charity and decorum as was for the most part present during the convention.

Steve Waring